Speaker 1 0:00

We need to look at the night sky.

Speaker 8 0:02

Be prepared to think and feel anything.

Speaker 1 0:05

There are no for me.

Speaker 7 0:13

What's out there? Let's do it. One of the things was an auto-tune box. You know that like does the auto-tune box.

Speaker 5 0:23

Do we have like um um Lil' Wayne?

Speaker 7 0:25

Yeah.

Speaker 5 0:26

Oh, do we have it here right now? We do have it. Yeah.

Speaker 7 0:30

We can try. I haven't really figured it out yet exactly.

Speaker 5 0:33

Um, but all the searches were like I feel like I'm watching like Doc from Whoa.

Speaker 1 0:43

Whoa. Oh baby, baby. It's only nothing only one. I can be that guy. And what is your name? Do you have a girlfriend?

Speaker 6 1:00

Oh yeah, that guy is so fucking funny.

Speaker 5 1:02

Maddie, you were born for auto tune. This is really fun. You have to kind of help it out.

Speaker 7 1:10

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to like because if you sing, if you hit every note correctly, it doesn't do the thing because it's not correct enough.

Speaker 8 1:21

It's amazing.

Speaker 4 1:24

Mariah Cary. I could watch this a long for a long time. Welcome, Maddie. Budge to the wonder pod. That's me.

unknown 1:34

Welcome.

Speaker 4 1:35

Tell us about yourself.

Speaker 5 1:38

About myself. Three things about me. Three things about me.

Speaker 8 1:41

Yep.

Speaker 5 1:42

And three things about me. I decided our first one was I'm a meaning maker. I just can't help myself. I make meaning out of everything, for better or worse. I will loop back around to what that means. Whoa. You're gonna tell us about what that means? Okay. Specifically why it haunts, but also helps in my life. Great, looking forward to it. I'm a closeted poet. Uh-huh. Uh huh. Wow. I shared some poetry with Sare.

Speaker 4 2:12

You're out of the closet as far as I'm concerned.

Speaker 7 2:13

Yeah, toe out, you know, you're just kind of peeking up.

Speaker 5 2:16

Well, I plan to I plan to come out in this episode because I have three poems I want to share. Yeah, I was hoping you would. And I'll drop them as they make sense in the conversation. Hit us with it. Closeted Poet. And I want to do more like open mics and the commons open mic.

Speaker 6 2:35

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 2:35

Yeah. I loved your holiday one with your sister. Yes. And we're continuing, that's a continued project. The delights. Sweet. And I would say I'm a lover.

Speaker 8 2:46

Yay.

Speaker 5 2:47

I love my friends. I love my family. I love like there's just so much to love. There's so much to like be in love with and fall in love with and like be broken by, kind of. Whoa. And the quote that I love. Oh, that's at the end. But there is a quote that I love about being a lover. By Ada Lamon, the poet is I am here to love and be moved by love. And I think that's gorgeous.

Speaker 4 3:16

It is gorgeous. Well, what a beautiful intro.

Speaker 6 3:19

Indeed.

Speaker 4 3:20

Makes me want to get to know ya. So make meaning for us.

Speaker 5 3:24

Oh, yeah. So I just can't help myself. I there's a specific story that I when I realized that I do this and that it helps and hurts me a little bit. I was driving home from Portland. I was on the Sandy Ann Pass. Just outside of Sisters, there's a bunch of there's a bunch of fields and a lot of wild horses in those fields sometimes. Like they there's just like herds of horses. And they're kind of wild, but then they're like our fenced end too. It was in the spring. I was driving to bend, and there were all these little foals, all these baby horses, just tons of them. And I was just like, oh my gosh, they're so cute. And like, I need to pull over, I need to pull over and look at the baby horses. And it was it's a one-lane highway at that point. And there was a car right behind me, and so it was really hard to pull over because every time a turnoff happened, I was like, Oh, yeah, like last minute. Yeah, yeah, you can't just like whip in to the turnoffs. So I kept going and going and trying and got pretty far away from the horses, and I was like, ugh, now this is just a big effort, and it's almost kind of dangerous to turn around, and maybe I just won't. But then I was like, No, I'm gonna turn around because I don't see baby horses every day. Yeah, found a place to turn around, went back, pulled over on the side of the road, and at this point it was sunset, all the mountains are visible from that point, it's completely open, and the colors were crazy, and I went up to the fence, and right when I went up to the fence, I noticed that one horse was struggling, like standing up and then like falling back down and neighing. And I was like, I'm witnessing a horse dying right now. Like, what do I do about this? I this is crazy, no one else is around, and this horse is just like flopping around. And it was interesting that I saw two other horses standing around the horse that was having a hard time to just kind of like close to it, and then like felt this energy and like looked over, and there was a horse looking straight at me. And I kind of like backed up because it felt like I feel like this horse is gonna jump the fence and charge at me. Like, this is like this is like they're watching me, and I feel like I'm like, oh, I'm not a predator, like I'm a friend. Sorry. So then I'm like I just kind of shocked, or like I don't know what to do. And then the horse that was struggling stands up and this big white sack falls out of it. And I was like, it was in labor. Oh my god. Oh my god. And then the uh the the sack was like not broken, and when it fell out, then it was stretching, and then it broke open just to the like bottom of the neck of the new little horse.

Speaker 8 6:30

Yeah, and I was like, what is like what just happened?

Speaker 5 6:35

And just like this whiplash of what I thought was happening. Oh my god. And I was shocked, and I got back in my car and I was like, whoa, that was insane. And then I was driving and I was like, don't make meaning out of it, don't make meaning out of it. Because I'm trying to just like be like, that was cool, and that was just in the moment, and that it's enough. What it was was like more than enough. I don't need to like build a story around it, and then just a story dropped in my head of wow, I had this arbitrary goal of getting back to bend kind of for no reason. Like, I was just like, I almost didn't turn around because I was just making it home, and there was no reason I needed to be home, like no time I needed to be home, but that was just like the task I was doing.

Speaker 8 7:23

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 7:23

And I was like, wow, how much we miss when we're going after these like arbitrary goals and not letting ourselves stop and like be more expansive with our time. So wow, I can't help but just like create that stuff for myself, and sometimes that's beautiful, and sometimes it kind of binds me to stories I don't really need to be in.

Speaker 6 7:46

Sure, sure.

Speaker 5 7:48

I was laughing because I was in Maui recently, and there was this guidebook excerpt about this hike that I was going on, and there was this part of the hike that you'll reach a fork in the road, and you can take the high road or you can take the low road. And then the tour person who wrote it said, and if you're not bound by metaphor, you can take either road because they both end at the same place. And I was like, I'm bound.

Speaker 6 8:19

I'm bound crawled out.

Speaker 5 8:21

I'm bound by metaphor.

Speaker 7 8:23

Oh, that's funny. So which road did you take?

Speaker 5 8:27

I I don't even think I realized when I was there. So I don't know what road I took because it just turns out it didn't matter.

Speaker 8 8:36

Yeah.

Speaker 4 8:38

Did you so you grew up Christian and we're gonna talk about that at some point? But did you do you wonder if the reason part of the reason you make meaning out of everything is because well, like, did you did you go to like an actual physical church or did you okay did share was only one person talking or were was the congregation also talking?

Speaker 5 9:01

Sundays only one person, but then I'd go to like Bible study on Wednesdays and youth group on Thursdays and would you make would you when it was your turn would you pick something and then make meaning out of it? I don't even remember do like what I said or how I was. I think I was so at that point up and till high school, maybe like even through college, I think I was so kind of focused on how I was being perceived. Uh sure that I don't I don't know what I said and it was probably for the audience interesting instead of what was true to me. I think it's it's been kind of recent since about 2020 that I've been like, wait, I just wanna explore myself. I don't why was I fitting myself into everyone else? And that was something I had to kind of uncover and because I love my family. I had a really good growing up experience for the most part. I don't know, it's kind of confusing because I know it's hard I know that's complicated. I I get it, but it was a bit of an assimilation environment, very much so an assimilation environment. So that's just what I was taught to do.

Speaker 4 10:27

Yeah.

Speaker 5 10:27

And finding my way out of that has now been really fun, and I'm having a blast with it. Good! But in the in the beginning was really scary.

Speaker 7 10:38

I bet, yeah.

Speaker 4 10:39

Same. We have a lot to talk about on that topic. I was asking about the making meaning stuff because I remember growing up we had Bible studies, and whoever was going to share would take turns and they'd pick a Bible verse or they'd pick something that happened in their week and then they'd make meaning out of it. And so that was just kind of like the structure, in my opinion, of how that went every week. Like, okay, it's my turn to make meaning. Okay, it's your turn.

Speaker 5 11:06

And I mean, now that you say that completely, like that is the structure. Okay.

Speaker 4 11:11

Yeah, because here's what we're saying. That's what I did every time. How does it apply to your life? Yes, exactly. Like we're all we're all reading this uh chapter, and now I'm gonna pick a verse from it, and then I'm going to tell you what it means to me. And sometimes I would fudge it a bit.

Speaker 7 11:27

Like I was to make the story work.

Speaker 4 11:29

I mean, I was pretty I was pretty honest, but sometimes I felt like okay, I don't really have anything to say about this, but I'm just gonna create something. I'm just gonna I it wasn't that I was it wasn't that I was just mi making something up, but I think I stretched uh your experience my experience so that I had something to share so that people be like, oh, Meredith did their homework, you know, Meredith read the chapter or whatever. So that's why I was asking.

Speaker 5 11:56

And that's so true, and I think I didn't even realize that, but yes. Yes, so that's an interesting Yeah, I wonder if that's part of why you do that. Context for that. Yeah. And I love it at the same time that I can now see its limits too. Because I create a story for myself, and it's hard to get out of my stories. Or it's fun to then now know that I do that, and so I can like create stories that I want, not stories that I think that I'm have to be. That's cool.

Speaker 4 12:25

We can do whatever we want, yeah.

Speaker 7 12:26

Because it can be an incredibly powerful tool for yourself, you know, or for other people around you to like have a story that supports kind of the idea of what you're trying to do, right? Or like a way to make otherwise things that would otherwise be kind of like feeling like sort of random into some kind of understandable like direction from I mean just to like connect them and also just like motivationally and I make everything a sign, like I find something on the side of the road, and that was the answer to this thing I was worried about, and that's stuff just drops out from the sky and like of guiding.

Speaker 5 13:10

I have this because of my Christian background, I have this guidance orientation to my thing for everything, and I'm looking for someone.

Speaker 4 13:21

Someone or something is in charge. Yeah.

Speaker 7 13:24

Driving the show.

Speaker 5 13:26

Or I like co-creating. Like there's there's there are little like take it or leave it paths, like little nudges. Should I choose to take that nudge on or to be like?

Speaker 4 13:48

It sounds like your brain is pretty whimsical. It feels like there's a lot of um I mean I know there's a lot of you know stuff that's not whimsical in there, like from religion, but or I'm assuming.

Speaker 5 14:00

But um, it sounds like there's like a lot of like sparkles and like what if I wonder that I literally told someone yesterday at the park that they need to automate their whimsy.

Speaker 6 14:11

What does that mean? Yeah, we need some elaboration on that.

Speaker 5 14:15

So just be like, I know that this thing makes me feel whimsical. I know that going to the park and smoking a little bit of weed and reading a good book and listening to some good music makes me feel like life is more magical, and I will go do that, and I'm gonna like automate it. So if I'm maybe not exactly a park thing, but what makes me feel good and puts me in that space, and and I'm gonna I don't need to reinvent the wheel, I'm just gonna go back to it.

Speaker 7 14:40

Like whimsy habits. You need a whimsy.

Speaker 5 14:42

Yeah, habit making. Automate your whimsy.

Speaker 7 14:45

Wow. It sounds it's funny because it sounds so um it's not really.

Speaker 5 14:49

It's kind of the oxymoron. Yeah.

Speaker 7 14:51

There we go. That's the word. Yeah. But then it makes total sense to to have a facility that allows you to kind of like that forces you into that mind state when you maybe otherwise are like the rest of your life is not kind of like pointing you in that direction. You know?

Speaker 5 15:07

When I'm feeling lowered down, sometimes I just like to allow myself to feel lowered down, but when I'm like, I don't really want to be in this space, then what are the things I know I can do that will make me feel like things are more inspiring or exciting?

Speaker 4 15:24

Or calm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Calmness is something I'm working on. Same. Every like multiple times a day, I'm like, whoop, lost it. Gotta go find it. I'm definitely more comfortable in chaos. Yeah. I agree. You and I have that in common.

Speaker 7 15:42

I'm trying to be more comfortable in chaos because it can be really fun and exciting and inspiring and whimsical, like you're describing. And sometimes I'm like, ah, it's too much.

Speaker 5 15:52

I'm a bit almost addicted to the chaos. Yep. And that's not great for relationships or schedules. Just like general day and night differentiation well-being of just being able to like be a steady person. Go to work, not work. Shit. My work is very chaotic. Yeah.

Speaker 7 16:16

So well, I guess in some I mean that's right, then that's sort of a gift for you, right? That you can function on that and be like, yeah, this is fine. I'm not like overwhelmed, or I don't know.

Speaker 4 16:24

I'm sure you are overwhelmed sometimes, but like well, just because we're just because we're addicted to chaos doesn't mean we're not overwhelmed.

Speaker 5 16:31

Right. But it's fun to find that gear of I'm so in chaos, and how do I like now I'm in like now I can focus because I have ADHD? If I'm if I'm bored or things are too calm or too slow, then I can kind of like melt into this just like but if things are chaotic and they require my attention and my action, then I can really go like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, like next thing, next thing, next thing.

Speaker 4 17:00

Yeah. And I like being in that space. Did I get enough to eat? Okay, I can jive. And if I didn't, I can't fucking deal with it. Okay, let's spin the wheel. The wheel of wonder! So that out. Hold it next to the mic and give it a good old spin. Nice. Well done.

Speaker 5 17:20

Big questions. Fabulous.

Speaker 7 17:22

Alright, we haven't had that in a while.

Speaker 5 17:24

Thank you. Tell me more.

Speaker 7 17:26

Um okay, so when was the last time you felt really proud of yourself?

Speaker 5 17:33

Ooh. Okay. I recently was in a very short relationship, and I noticed things that were misaligned for me, and said that these things were misaligned, and had a good mature conversation about it, and ended it, and unfollowed and removed as a follower on Instagram and moved on with my life. And that just felt like boom. Yeah, like it's taking a long time to get there. Good job. That's not worth the chaos. And there even was maybe we could stay in touch, maybe we could continue to talk to each other. And I was like, We don't need any gray area right now. Like I've been there and I've learned that we don't need to be friends with everyone. Yes, yes, yes. So I'm really proud of myself for that. And that's kind of the first time that I've been in that situation and I've chosen this path, and it's felt very freeing, and it's given me a lot of confidence of I know I I don't necessarily know what's right for me, but I know what's wrong for me. Sure. Fuck yeah. And I think I'll know what's right for me too. Like it's either something feels in alignment or it doesn't. And it and it was nice that it didn't need to be the other person's fault either. Yeah. He texted me after and said, I'm so sorry if I hurt you, and blah blah blah. And I said, Thank you, I'm not hurt. I'm sad that my intuition is telling me that the most self-respecting thing to do is to disengage. Who are we if we don't align ourselves with that voice? Fuck yeah, it just felt like way to go. Very grown up. Thank you. And it felt like you nothing is inherently wrong about you, but we together aren't. And it feels good to not have like a right and a wrong in order to like no one fucked up. Yeah, and you don't have to no one has to be the villain, and it actually creates a lot of peace.

Speaker 7 19:33

Totally.

Speaker 4 19:34

That's beautiful.

Speaker 7 19:35

Wow.

Speaker 4 19:36

That feels very hygienic, very hy very clean, tidy.

unknown 19:39

Thanks.

Speaker 5 19:40

So I guess I'm not as chaotic as I might say.

Speaker 4 19:43

So in the past, would you would you find yourself staying in relationships that weren't aligned and not know, not have a clear answer about what to do about it?

Speaker 5 19:51

I was in a four-year back and forth mess. Ooh. Just this cyclical, yeah, yeah, yeah. Crazy. Like when I wanted to be with him, he didn't want to be with me. When he wanted to be with me, I didn't want to be with him. We were like, let's just be friends, and then inevitably it would start the cycle back over. Yeah. And we just were not the right fit for each other, and we could not accept it. And it caused so much pain. And I'm just not, and now we're really good friends.

Speaker 4 20:24

Oh my god, well done.

Speaker 5 20:25

But we didn't talk for like a year and then had to kind of like find our footing again.

Speaker 7 20:31

Yeah, it's like it's almost like rebuilding a totally new relationship after that, I feel like. Like with a new person almost.

Speaker 5 20:36

Yes. Yes. And so refreshing that I can see him in a totally different light now. Yeah. Of wow, when I'm not putting my needs on you, you shine like I can see you in all these different ways that I really love and admire. Were you friends first, or did you just go right into dating? We met at a Bible study. A community group. So our the church I was going to paired us with people that we live next to, or not paired, but grouped us. Oh, interesting. So I said I I'm in Northwest Portland, and then they said, Great, here's people within five blocks of you. And that five blocks? Wow, that's amazing. So we were neighbors, and that's so nice. So we met in that context and then it started kind of entertaining, dating shortly after that.

Speaker 4 21:36

I'm asking because sometimes I think it can be helpful to be friends with someone you dated if you were friends first.

Speaker 5 21:46

We were very loosely friends first, but yes, I agree. Yes. That's why any hinge meetup is hard for me to transition to dating because we met in the c or Friends because we met in the context of dating. Yeah, right. But you said that you're able to transition that, which I thought was cool.

Speaker 4 22:08

Um, lately I am. Hasn't always been the case.

Speaker 5 22:13

The apps, I think I'm boycotting them. Oh, really? Mm-hmm. Ooh. I'm just gonna go out there and do what I want to do. What does that mean? I'm gonna show up to community events and do what I want to do. And if someone comes along, that's great. But I'm just gonna do what I want and allow it to naturally. I want like an organic thing. Awesome. I just think that's more aligned with me. Beautiful.

Speaker 4 22:45

I love the apps. I've met so many. I've made a lot of friends on there, and I've met, I mean, I met Wolf on Tinder or something. I can't remember. We dated for like eight months. What?

Speaker 2 23:03

Does everyone know this? Episode 16, the truth comes out.

Speaker 6 23:10

The truth is there. I don't know. It's not a secret. It's not a secret, but it's so long ago that happened.

Speaker 7 23:21

Yeah, like eight months. Then there was quite a quite a fiery fallout, I would say. And then we basically didn't talk to each other for like probably like nine months or maybe a little bit more.

Speaker 4 23:31

And now look at us. And now look at us.

unknown 23:34

Yeah.

Speaker 4 23:35

It was touching me there for a bit. Practically married. Yeah, but we had a good eight months. I mean leading up to the fallout. Yeah, it was a very calming piece in my experience, just very calming dynamic.

Speaker 7 23:52

Yeah, and I feel like our ability to become friends again afterwards was really like basically facilitated by our friend group. Like I think if we had not been in the same friend group, I don't think we would have ever been friends again after that.

Speaker 4 24:05

I don't know, and I haven't thought about that, and that's a I don't know about that.

Speaker 7 24:10

I doubt it. I mean I feel like there was just a lot of like We were not on the same page about some stuff. Um Right, right. But I think that the our being in a similar like sort of being forced to be adjacent to each other even when we were like a bit upset with one another.

Speaker 4 24:29

Oh my god. It was not figuring out how to cohabitate. It was so much more than a lot of people.

Speaker 7 24:34

Yeah, but I think it's like I feel like in some ways it's sort of similar to like you know, you can like fight with your siblings and then like because you've spent so much time with them over the years that like it's easier to like there's enough sort of inertia in the relationship to like rebuild after that. And I feel like our being in the same friend group and thus being sort of forced to spend more time around each other than we would have otherwise sort of like provided some of that inertia to be like, okay, like we can kind of like slowly kind of rebuild a new kind of relationship.

Speaker 4 25:06

It is a totally new relationship.

Speaker 7 25:08

Yeah.

Speaker 4 25:08

In my opinion.

Speaker 7 25:09

Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 25:10

Yeah.

Speaker 7 25:10

Well, I mean, especially now looking back, just because both of us have changed, I would say so much since then.

Speaker 4 25:14

Yeah. Remember, I used to be scared of dogs.

Speaker 7 25:17

Used to be scared of dogs.

Speaker 4 25:18

And you, I don't know.

Speaker 7 25:21

Lots of problems.

Speaker 4 25:24

Yeah. I love that. Thanks. We've worked really hard. It was really shitty.

Speaker 7 25:29

Yeah, it was pretty terrible.

Speaker 4 25:30

And now this is just this is this friendship feels solid. Yeah. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Cool. So uh cool stuff.

Speaker 7 25:41

Nice job.

Speaker 4 25:41

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Speaker 7 25:43

Uh well, we should also go really quickly through the wonder quest that we just did.

Speaker 4 25:47

We definitely just jumped into the fucking pond. So there's that for one second.

Speaker 7 25:53

Yeah, for a very brief moment.

Speaker 4 25:55

I was I was in and out real quick.

Speaker 7 25:59

Yeah, Mare was the first one in. I mean, you could you were like, we're gonna get this over with. I'm getting it. Yeah.

Speaker 5 26:04

My toes are still a little bit oh, really. Are they really tiny bit cold? Oh no. But that's nice too. The lingering feeling of our accomplishments.

Speaker 2 26:13

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 5 26:15

It felt really good once we got out. Do you need a blanket? No, I'm good. Okay. Okay. Sharp.

Speaker 4 26:22

Spicy, spicy. Okay, okay. Yeah. Well, I'm gonna go first and share what I discovered about this plunge. And I I actually thought about this going into it. I'm like, I already know I'm gonna scream. I'm a screamer. Didn't I scream?

Speaker 6 26:35

Oh yeah.

Speaker 4 26:36

Yeah.

Speaker 6 26:36

Everybody screamed.

Speaker 4 26:37

Yeah, we all screamed.

Speaker 6 26:38

It's like 50 degrees outside and the water is much colder than that.

Speaker 4 26:43

Yeah, it was fucking it was frigid. Um I knew that I would scream regardless of the temperature. Um I think I screamed last time we did it in the summer.

Speaker 7 26:54

It was a different kind of scream, I think.

Speaker 4 26:57

I mean I got a lot of yeah, I got a whole binder of different options. Um but I was at uh kickball practice last night for the first time. I joined a kickball team.

Speaker 5 27:09

Didn't I invite you? I'm realizing I never responded to that. Okay, can I still join? Please Wolf's in it too! Come hang out with me. I'm horrible at kickball. I'm horrible at all.

Speaker 4 27:23

I have a team sports. I haven't played since I was a child.

Speaker 5 27:26

Okay.

Speaker 4 27:27

So I don't do team sports. Great. But as of to as of last night, I'm like, let's do something new. So this is a new story for me. Come on over. It'll be really fun. We'll talk about it. So um anytime I had to kick the ball or run to a base or catch the ball, I screamed. Interesting. And I was getting I was like, I was getting anxious about that because it's not that I wanted to. It was just this involuntary panic that I needed everyone to be aware of. Um and it reminded me of just I've always done this. Like even when I was younger, I just I'm a loud fucking person. And I'm with you. Yeah, I'm not, I'm not holding the things inside me. I'm letting them out. I'm taking up space. Yes. I'm telling people what's happening. Um and I have mixed feelings about that. I think I feel I I felt worried that I was being annoying. Like part of it was just excitement. Like, oh my gosh, I am on a kickball team. Look, it's my turn to kick. Oh my gosh, I'm running to first base. Don't get me. You know?

Speaker 6 28:34

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 28:35

Um part of it was panic because I haven't fucking done stuff like this since I was a kid. And I didn't even like recess as a kid. Dodgeball, don't fucking throw a ball at me. I'm gonna go to the library.

Speaker 5 28:49

Those 10-year-old boys with those arms.

Speaker 4 28:51

10-year-old boys with arms, not a fan. Concussions, glasses, my glasses being imprinted into my face. I didn't like recess. I liked playing outside, I liked moving around, but I just didn't like like the aggression or the like big competition. So yeah, that's probably also part of what came out last night when I was anyway. So I went into this pond thing, being like, I know I'm gonna scream. And it's not really anything I'm discovering about myself uh new in a new way, but it's just something that I'm observing and mulling over. And that is all that I have to say.

Speaker 7 29:27

Alright.

Speaker 4 29:30

Yeah. Maddie, what did you discover when you jumped in the water and screw screamed? Nothing really profound. Actually, Maddie um Maddie sent us a voice memo that we are going to put in right after this of Maddie jumping in with Elise a few friends, and most of them have been on the podcast. Brendan, Connor, Elise hasn't been on yet.

Speaker 7 29:57

We're working on that.

Speaker 4 29:58

Uh, we're working to get her. Please help us pressure Elise to be on here. Elise, you're formally pressured right now. So coy. Um, and yeah, she has so much to say. Oh my gosh. She has so much to share. I know. I'm like, please fucking sit with us in Wolf Studio. Um, but anyway, you sent us a voice memo of you guys doing a cold plunge two days ago, and it was so funny. So we'll play that now.

Speaker 30:24

Okay, we are walking into the water. Some of us have run to warm ourselves up before the water, and some of us are just going in cold. Hoes are in.

Speaker 2 30:34

Frickens running ahead for usual. Okay, to the knees. The balmy uh 19 degrees. What do you think? How how cold the water is? Water is probably like 40. Oh. Let me like 30, 40. Oh! Oh no, okay, here go the bit. Three. Two. What? Ah! Woo! Everybody close it!

unknown 31:04

It's so cold!

Speaker 7 31:05

Is this gonna be like an eight-minute recording?

Speaker 31:08

No, it's never let an eight-minute recording stand.

Speaker 8 31:13

Is this gonna be like a three-minute recording?

Speaker 31:15

I sent that man five fun facts about fucking otters, and he's like, I mean, you get two. Did you hear that? We get two. Called out. Anyway, the producer of this show sounds like a real tool. Well, first question, have you rash? Oh, two! Oh water goes.

Speaker 2 31:37

Okay, he's drifting. Woo! Let's put our heads underwater. Which concludes the day.

Speaker 5 31:48

What I've learned about cold plunging is it's so much better with other people. Yeah. Yes, that is very true. It's like you don't even think about it. And I'm a runner too, so whenever I'm running with other people, I call it free miles. Because you just don't even it's just social time and it it just fills a lot of different cups. So cold plunging with people is the way to go. The ultimate. If you're trying to get into cold plunging and you're doing it alone, you're doing it wrong.

Speaker 4 32:20

Share the load.

Speaker 7 32:21

My experience, I reinforce this experience that I have every time I do this, where I anticipate in my head that it's gonna be hard and painful, and then I get in the water, and it's always a more it's always a more like I appreciate the experience and enjoy it much more than I expect every time. But I've already like created this story in my head that I need to get in and get out because it's gonna be hard and uncomfortable and painful. And that story's already kind of running, right, as the realization is happening that I'm like, this is actually like kind of okay, kind of nice. Yeah. But by the time that I'm like, oh, I could have just stayed, I'm already out. And then I do not want to get back in.

Speaker 5 32:56

Yeah, of course not. But and we just talked about this in the reverse as we were getting into the cold plunge that with weed we always think that it's gonna be a good time, and then it never is. And then you inevitably forget.

Speaker 4 33:10

At the beginning, and then part way through, I'm like, oh, feeling stoned feels so nice. And I'm like smiling and I'm whistling, and and then a couple hours in, I'm like, I wish I like I regret getting high. I'm not enjoying this anymore. And then you forget. Yeah. And then the next time you're like, oh yeah, smoke bot, feel good.

Speaker 5 33:30

So the same thing in reverse. I think I'm gonna feel good and I feel bad with weed. Yeah. And then with cold plunging, I think I'm gonna feel bad, but I feel good. Thank you for that. Thank you for that uh framing.

Speaker 7 33:40

Wow, what a story.

Speaker 5 33:44

How do I apply this to my life?

Speaker 4 33:46

Let's make meaning.

Speaker 7 33:50

Um, all right. Well, Maddie, do you have a um one request for our next guest?

Speaker 5 33:55

I do. And next guest is Hannah. Correct. Yep. Is that supposed to be a secret?

Speaker 7 34:00

I don't know. Guess not.

Speaker 5 34:01

You know what? I'm okay with it. I don't need it to be a secret. Okay. Well, sorry for blowing wide open. Don't worry about it. Hannah, I want you to oh yes. Yeah. All of you. I want you to record five delights from the past week.

Speaker 4 34:18

Oh, Maddie, that's wonderful.

Speaker 5 34:20

The smaller and more everyday, the better.

Speaker 4 34:22

Oh, I love this.

Speaker 7 34:24

One of mine's probably gonna be a bird, yeah.

Speaker 4 34:26

Yes, perfect. Two, two or three or four or five of them are gonna be birds. He does that.

Speaker 5 34:31

There's no rules. And this is inspired by this ongoing project I have with my sister on recording delights. And last year we kept a big list of delights on our phone, and then she's a pianist, and we went to the commons and she played a medley, and I read some of the delights, not all of them, because we had so many, but she's we split it up into seasons. So we had all the seasons and all the delights that fit into the seasons as she played, and so beautiful, and we've continued that tradition, and we're building our delights for 2026, which is so fun because when you decide to look for delights, delights beget delights. Like they're exponential when you decide to be delighted on the hunt. Yeah, and I'm delighted by the delights that my sister puts in the note. Yeah, and and it was a delight to share the delights. And can you give us some examples of what was on that list? Yes, I'll share some recent ones that we just did. I was recently in Europe and I wrote sneaking away for a solo cappuccino at the corner coffee shop in Rouen, France. Sipping, writing postcards, and reading Jane Era while looking down a narrow cobblestone of medieval shops and apartments.

Speaker 35:54

Wow.

Speaker 5 35:54

That's a bit longer than usual. That same day, McKinsey wrote a post ski hot tub. She also wrote Making Dad's chicken dumpling recipe and it being just as good as my memory.

Speaker 4 36:09

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 5 36:10

That's profound. What else? I wrote this one. I was walking to the library and overheard conversation, walking by two very gin Z Genziers. Should I just text Jenna back and say, let's squash the beef and I'll just hang out? That was all.

Speaker 4 36:32

That was all that you wrote.

Speaker 7 36:34

Did you did you opine on that in the moment? Did you tell them that I definitely should text Jenna back?

Speaker 5 36:40

No, because I felt like the kids are okay. This is so good. The kids are alright. Oh, my sister just wrote this one that I haven't seen yet. Maddie Becoming a Lover of Her Birthday.

Speaker 8 36:55

Oh.

Speaker 5 36:56

When's your birthday? I used to be upset about my birthday and mad at McKinsey for it because it was her fault. She was born on July 18th. I was born on January 11th. Sucks. I was convinced growing up that summer birthdays were superior. Yeah. And I was so upset about it. And my mom was like, Do you want to celebrate on your half birthday? We can celebrate your birthday July 11th. And I was like, no. But I love my birthday now. And I love being a winter baby. And I actually kind of prefer the winter to the summer now.

Speaker 8 37:30

Wow.

Speaker 4 37:30

That is delightful. Oh, I love that your sister can point stuff out for you.

Speaker 5 37:35

And we and I love that's a really special part of our relationship that I think we really do that for each other. We really like illuminate. She's very whimsical and oh she is. We really feed off of each other. And there's things that she really appreciates that draws me into appreciation for them. She loves going on. I'm not a morning person, but she's obsessed with going on sunrise runs or sunrise skate skis. And sometimes I'm down to go with her. Yeah. And having the sun in her face and having it be warm, the rising sun in her face, and standing in it and feeling the warmth. And that's something I've really gained an appreciation for because of her.

Speaker 4 38:22

I'm actually really excited about this. So for one week, did you say?

Speaker 5 38:27

Yeah.

Speaker 4 38:27

Write down five things.

Speaker 5 38:29

I just put it in a note. We have a shared note and we put it.

Speaker 7 38:33

Listener, if you want to follow along, you want to do your five. What were they called?

Speaker 3 38:39

Delights.

Speaker 7 38:40

Delights. Five delights. Um, send them to us. You can send us an email. Wow at wonder.media, and we'll read them on the show and share them while we're talking.

Speaker 5 38:50

So they can be so small. Like this one I just read McKinsey's Dog's name is Cosmo. When Cosmo takes a really deep breath, which forces me to take a really deep breath.

Speaker 7 39:02

Oh, God, yeah. Damn.

Speaker 4 39:04

This is really I feel like you guys are getting healthier because of this thing that you're doing. Not that you were un Not that you were unhealthy before, but I think just think this is the pr the practice of gratitude is pretty powerful.

Speaker 5 39:16

And our focus for this year, we didn't have a focus last year, but our focus for this year is write whatever delight comes to you, but also specifically look for delighting in the hard. Can you find good in a hard situation? And what is that?

Speaker 4 39:35

Thank you so much. Thank you for bringing that to us. I appreciate that. And this is inspired by a book.

Speaker 5 39:41

The Book of Delights by Ross Gay.

Speaker 39:44

There we go.

Speaker 5 39:45

And he also wrote Inciting Joy, which he picked up at my house and had a really special experience with, which I love.

Speaker 4 39:53

So yeah, the other day um I was at your house, Emma and Maddie's house, and I um I got a massage from Emma. So because Emma's in massage school. And then Jacob got a massage, and while he was um getting massaged, um, I picked up this book. I was waiting for the hour, and I picked up this book with it it was a bunch of essays by Roskay. And I had not been able to cry in months, maybe, or longer. I don't know. It's been eight, it was so bottled up. And one of those essays just tore me open, and I just bawled. And it was so therapeutic and so helpful. And by the time they came back out, I was like, guys, you'll never believe. I released some stuff, it was so helpful, and I enjoyed crying. Like I was just sitting on the couch, and I mean, sometimes crying can be a really shitty feeling, but I felt joy. I was like, thank god that this was coming out. So yeah, that book was really helpful. And I still need to, I still want to buy the book so I can keep on.

Speaker 5 41:09

And I haven't read the whole thing. I read three essays. It's one of those little essays. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So hard to have momentum with and continue to come back to, but really like poignant when you need it.

Speaker 4 41:24

Yeah, thank you for the reminder. I do want to get the book.

Speaker 7 41:27

So well, shall we take a little break? Yeah, let's take a break. All right, we'll be back shortly on the wonder pod.

Speaker 4 41:35

Don't go anywhere.

Speaker 8 41:37

Don't go anywhere, we'll be right back.